I am the next Confuscius.
*Strikes an Elvis pose*
Salute me.
Thanks to Guang and his friend,who intro to him first. It's a very meaningful test. Go take it! And Xuewei also got Philosopher! OMG! HAHAHA
Carrying your name, close to me.
10:54 AM
10:54 AM
Ok this is my 100th post! And it's also sort of like a ending post lah. Something sad yet happy. Something paradoxical.
Here goes.
Hey I know we were close to the point that we were even buddies. I appreciate that alot cause I really didn't know girls have guy buddies. So maybe I was late in telling you my feelings but at least I finally did. I wanted to tell you in 2007 when we got our results but I guess it was not meant to be.
I fell for you first in Sec.3 but I dilly and dally then end up screw my own life up. But when I liked other girls, I didnt lose hope that one day MAYBE it could happen between us. Now it all seems like a damn big laugh. As the months went on and I began to see your qualities, I was really amazed that we had nearly same qualities and goals. I will be lying if I wished you well for you and him but I won't be so "Sour-Grapes" to curse you two. All I say is be happy and smile.
I am driven by the fact we live only once. Thats why I find it a big regret not to actually tell you that I had feel about you and then suddenly you're with him. Although most people marvel at your choice in conversations, I tell them that it's your choice. Afterall, you liked him since damn long already.
Through the months, I sat quietly and only gave small hints and watched as you celebrated your birthday. What I did looked special but surely there is nothing more special than spending time with him. So I guess, I was chasing a lost cause all the while. Thats when I almost wanted to give up and wanted to write my confession to you.
Honestly, I wouldn't know where I will be if it ain't for your support and your nonsense sometimes. You lit up my life damn brightly, perhaps even blowing the fuse off. But I know that after today, things will go back to normal.
So I guess life moves on. Without you. And don't worry after some time apart I'll be back. I just need some time off first. NOT TO CRY..but to contemplate a few things again.
At the end of the day, I will not forget you nor erase you from my memory. Too hard already. Permanent. At least I did something I can be proud of.
WALK GIRL HOME FOR 1 AND 1/4 YEARS!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
After that hour today, I smiled as I boarded the bus. I felt as though a huge relief just swept through me. I can't explain the feeling that I had but it was just awesome.
Alot of people say I slow. Hahaha. I say if Fate decides better things for you, girl, then perhaps It was right to have delayed me. I am sad that it's about to end yet happy cause there is a new chapter. Don't always quarrell with him. He loves you afterall, doesn't he?
With unrequited loves, Your buddy.
-----
100th post. I really write a lot of cock-and-bull story here right? But at the end of the day, 1 life. Don't expect to know a Mark Zheng in your next life. Neither will I know you.
Anyway, cheers for the New Year. Oh and please flood all your friends handphone with new year messages at 11.55-11.59 tomorrow night.
=D Cheers to a beautiful Saturday afternoon.
Carrying your name, close to me.
4:38 PM
4:38 PM
I am seriously damn F***ed up about something. To date right, I should have received my red jersey, my brother's boots and my money. This should have arrived latest by September. So a few delays here and there, even after O Levels and AFTER O Levels, still don't have. So the team got their jerseys 2 weeks ago. I went to London before collection so that I can get a Christmas Present from the team.
BUT, due to a-now-very-regular screw-up, I NEVER EVEN GET. Yes sometimes I know it's not Shank's fault. Still, he doesn't come clean about the facts. And that's what pissses me off big time since October plus plus.
I am not alone. I heard whispers and murmurs about "Cheating our money", "Ran away with my money" when I was siding him.
Bottomline is THIS : I fought hard for the team to get their jersey and also be on Shank's side. BUT when the team got their stuff, I still haven't got mine. Considering I went to London for a F***ing week already, this is utter nonsense. I think my patience has ended.
NUMBER ONE
When the delievery guy gave him the stuff, why the F*** he didnt check for 25 jerseys before concluding the deal? Like that the guy can say "Oh, we delievered already. The guy signed off already."
NUMBER TWO
Why the F*** he open his mouth so fast to suggest 10 bucks a day? Only he knows. Too bad Guang and Jasper with us so I am holding out his words.
Grand total he owes me and my bro as of 29th December is : $620 + $50.
So I made up my mind. He owes me the money. You think it's unreasonable? Come tell me online. I tell you what he tells me.
To Shank : You know what you promised me. You pushed your damn luck too far and you know it. This is one time I won't be sorry. And I am serious. $670 and counting.
It was the last card I wanted to play. You forced my hand. You wanna scold me anything, go. Cause I and 23 others know whos the real "Whatever-You-Wanna-Call-Me" is in regards to my situation.
--------
Thanks to Shireen for the laughs she brought me, and some times blushes. LOL
Here's why.
--------
shireen - It just takes some time, little girl you're in the middle of the ride.
Mark - *[ The dangerous game of Illusions and UTS meanings. ]*
lol i blushing! hahahah
12/29/2006
10:56:33 PM
shireen - It just takes some time, little girl you're in the middle of the ride.
Mark - *[ The dangerous game of Illusions and UTS meanings. ]*
:X
12/29/2006
10:57:03 PM
Mark - *[ The dangerous game of Illusions and UTS meanings. ]*
shireen - It just takes some time, little girl you're in the middle of the ride.
dun la i also!
12/29/2006
10:57:05 PM
Mark - *[ The dangerous game of Illusions and UTS meanings. ]*
shireen - It just takes some time, little girl you're in the middle of the ride.
lol
12/29/2006
10:57:26 PM
shireen - It just takes some time, little girl you're in the middle of the ride.
Mark - *[ The dangerous game of Illusions and UTS meanings. ]*
OK OK calm down. breath in... hooooo.
---------
Erm, not the best way but definitely get the message across.
=D Smiles.
HAHAHA! Tomorrow, I got to redeem myself. In my absence, they beat 1 team 4-1. PRESSURE!!!!!!!
But I know everything will be alright if I just "play from my heart."
=D Big grin. Thanks for that advice. And don't worry. I won't repeat what I did last year.
Like I said, I have matured alot already. I am ready for any chemical reactions, good or bad.
OMZG I JUST SPOKE CHEMISTRY!! ^^
OH AND SHIREEN! This sign is for you babe!
V ^-^ V
Carrying your name, close to me.
10:54 PM
10:54 PM
Good Game. I lose. Let's end game.
Shall we?
=)
Carrying your name, close to me.
12:11 PM
12:11 PM
Ok time for a pit-stop from all the moments. During London, I got some time off from Singapore matters and to look at it from a further angle. Practically and literally. And while there, I contacted Confusicus and came up with two good examples.
NUMBER ONE
When a striker misses an open goal, he can do two things. Let himself be affected and get along with the remaining minutes to score. Confidence is essential and without it, he can't score much. Worse is his teammate scores a great goal. Does he celebrate knowing it's for the team, or does he sulk and withdraw away from his mate that just scored?
NUMBER TWO
You take a craftsman, who works very hard to try and crave out a statue. Halfway, he finds that MAYBE, just MAYBE, he has got the wrong tools. What does he do?
You have the answer, you tell me.
Loves and happy new year.
PS : I asked you to smile during the holidays right?
Carrying your name, close to me.
11:13 PM
11:13 PM
Britain. Lovely country, lovely people BUT damn expensive.
PROS
1. Their manners are top class.
2. Their fish&chips arereally out of this world.
3. Football stuff there are quite cheap.
CONS
1. Awfully gloomy.
2. Expensive. Things are cheap if your mum owns Britain
3. I miss Singapore. =(
HIGHLIGHTS
Stamford Bridge. Or part of it. Really nice stadium.
THE BLOODY PITCH! THEY LOCKED IT AWAY FROM PEOPLE! DAMN!
Hello from 11,600m aboove ground level. This was near Himalayas.
Beauty, isnt it.
Another view from 11,600m above ground. Excellent view.
Oh, did I mention the cabin was only 1/2 filled?
I was sitting like the King of England man.
London. How cold was it? BAH!
I was wearing only 1 stupid shirt and 1 jacket. No boasts but really, it's not THAT cold there.
Carrying your name, close to me.
12:04 AM
12:04 AM
Alright chaps, I am confirmed on the flight tomorrow night for the trip to where soccer began.
LONDON. But don't expect so much, I won't be stepping near Highbury nor Stamford Bridge.
As usual, Amanda and MZ's birthday fall around this period which also means that they will be getting birthday-Christmas presents from exotic places. For all the teasing they get for "coming out" late, they get benefits too.
So, 1 week of training gone and 1 week of match fitness busted. I will miss a match and also Christmas in SG. *Curses*
On Christmas night, I will be 50,000 feet above ground, celebrating with the air stewardess! ^^
I will return on Boxing Day night time around there. I will be waiting to come back here man. I hate going out of Singapore. If PM Lee talks about patriotic Singaporeans, I am definitely in his next Rally Day Speech.
Roxanne said aeroplane food tastes nice. Well, I want to see how good it will be. But I only tasted Econ-Class food twice and it was alright. The rest of the time were either Business or First, with more of the latter. I know you guys must be saying "Mark, Lucky bastard."
Hey, compensation for dragging me out of the country man. But I assure you when I sat Econ-Class it was really "HAHA!" for the people who thought this was unfair.
I sat on a freaking 23 hour flight from New York in Econ-Class and I can tell you I know how you guys feel. I couldnt feel my ass after that. Numb like hell.
So chaps, I am going there to improve my english and to learn a few accents. Learn a few curse and swear words along the way. But most of all to see why Roxanne calls it a nice city.
I don't want to get radiation and get bombed in a bus or get killed in The Tube( Their MRT ).
=(
Carrying your name, close to me.
9:51 PM
9:51 PM
You looked fantastic. It was with some kind of like radiance that showed on your face. I was just glad you were alright. What more could I ask? Seeing you so well and beautiful again makes my heart flutter. And you smile. Geez, if there ever was a better smile than yours, I don't know that lady yet.
But truly, I saw a pretty and elegant girl, contented with life and had every reason to smile. That illuminating smile was all that was needed to lift the day. Hahaha, this should not be what I am looking for. Afterall, my life is to battle out there on the pitch and to defend to help the team. Yours is completely different.
Simply put, I think you're the prettiest right now, but there is nothing more I can admire already.
=D
Keep smiling. It lights up the whole room, you know? I sure wish I could made you smile.
Carrying your name, close to me.
6:03 PM
6:03 PM
Hey chaps, I am off to London for a week there. My nutty parents insisted on going away from Singapore. 1 week also fun -.-
Anyway, if you guys want anything from London, do text me or tag so that I can get the stuff for you.
No gurantees I will get it for sure though.
Anyway, I think right, fairy tales should be left untouched. Agreed?
I am going away for a week to think and reset my erm..goals in life. Yeah. I will make choices and change to what I feel it's best. It's a good process except one thing.
I know that whatever decision I make, I won't forget. And I won't erase off. No matter how long, I still.
Sounds incomplete right? Sounds ok to me.
In London I will rethink, recharge and refire my life. I will make decisions that alter my own life and I will come back stronger. As proven last year, it looks pretty good. Why not two times lucky?
Let me give you a riddle to solve.
"If I lived in Tsarist rule, my life would be damn happy and I will be the most respected politician in Tsarist rule"
This is damn deep. Have fun solving it.
Carrying your name, close to me.
12:00 AM
12:00 AM
Gray skies. Bad weather.
I need a God-Given pre-match motivation before this Saturday urgently.
My morale has been sapped.
I think I got your hints more or less.
Ying gai tui hou le ba. =)
Carrying your name, close to me.
4:22 PM
4:22 PM
So I just came back from a whirlwind of talks with many people. And in between the stuff we talked about was really a testimony to how fast life changes.
You see, I tend to watch how life spirals around and I can see alot of things now that really fortified during these past weeks.
Daniel is definitely a damn nice chap to talk with. Talk about nonsense to serious stuff he is the one fellow. And he is the only living guy that calls his girlfriend ugly. He has his reasons man, but it was hilarious.
So anyway what I can say is simple, life goes on. Don't stop.
Very "deep" post if you know what I really want to say.
Carrying your name, close to me.
2:35 PM
2:35 PM
You know the previous post about DotA?
Fuck everything I said.
Carrying your name, close to me.
1:22 AM
1:22 AM
This is SO SO SO WRONG. What the postman must have been thinking, I don't know.
What I do know was that my brother was laughing his A** out when he saw the word "Sister".
Thanks Xuewei. Now I know why you're such a good friend.
-.- Sister.
Merry Christmas too, I won't be here to wish you.
Carrying your name, close to me.
9:58 AM
9:58 AM
It's going to be a damn good Monday. I know it'll be damn good. =D
WHOO!
Cheers pals!
Carrying your name, close to me.
11:30 AM
11:30 AM
Sunday sky. When you realise tomorrow is a free day, you tend to appreciate the sky more. Anyway today was a freaking lazy day at home. Woke at 8 thinking it was 10 before gaming for 4 hours and then - napping. I mean it's really -.- to nap at 12pm.
I think I got the MtG ( Magic the Gathering ) brain from Guang already. I am beginning to think more strategic although I still make some really noob-ish mistakes.
Hectic day tomorrow. Bishan beckons.
Carrying your name, close to me.
10:56 PM
10:56 PM
Back from the big match and I think that soft goal was big time my fault. Other than that I thought I Had quite a good game. My first time leading the Back4 leh!
Not too bad for first time leader, but 3 soft goals and a personal blunder just makes me feel worse.
Still, cannot complain. got a 7.5/10 from Guo. Here it is.
4. Mark( 7.5/10 ) - Kept the strikers at bay with plenty of good
clearances and good tackles, a pity a minute mistouch led to a soft goal. If not
for that? A pretty solid game with many clear headed decisions taken. {love,
Guo}
Erm, ignore the "{love, Guo}" part please. Thanks.
I feel kinda good actually cause I look at the reflection of myself in the bus windows and I see a very different Mark Zheng.
Truly, and I am not kidding, I've slimmed down. Months ago, it was this round kid who looked like Super-Sized Experimental Spieces VII. Now, I see a slimmed down and more mature Mark looking back at me. Last time, on my debut, I lasted 17 minutes. Today, I went through a full 90 minutes, with a spirit of helping the team instead of stalking a place for the Striker's place.
I must have looked damn kuku on the 31. Dirty and all I looked like some war-survivor. had it not been the jersey with my name, people would have thought I dropped into the drain or what. My jersey and pants were muddified truly.
It's mud cause I slided like nobody's business. I got a freaking wound on my back too. Damn the field man.
Photo by Guang. Ripped from MPFC Blog. This was the half-time talk amongst all the sectors of the team.
Carrying your name, close to me.
9:47 PM
9:47 PM
Ok added a few things this few days. Here's the new stuff.
Added
1. Daniel Guo's blog.
2. Sis's blog, which I didnt want to link cause got password.
3. Aqilah's blog.
4. Danny's blog.
-------------
I just received cash aid from my Dad. $50. How's that for luck?
And I am the resident loan shark of MPFC already. Treasurer in school boy terms but if you're in MPFC you'll know why I call the job title "Loan Shark".
Oh I love this element shirt of mine! So damn lovely! Usually people only say like that cause they spent alot of $ on it. But I really loved this shirt for 2 reasons. One is beacause it was very fitting and two is because it shows the formula of air. Takes me a step nearer to being a nerd.
Carrying your name, close to me.
12:22 AM
12:22 AM
New skin after so many works. Now with music and less navigation so that you can see all in 1 page.
So I haven't been actively playing DotA. Fantastic cutdown from the crazy fellow that sits in front of the computer and engage in killing sprees and monster kills. Today is Friday already. 1 week flies so fast and another going to zoom past us.
So a day of eating breakfast at 8 with Guo, meeting Nigel and Tom for lunch before going window shopping at PP. Who goes window shopping at Parkway by the way?! Sounds so noob!
Anyway I went to Settlers for a debut there. It's quite a nice place to go to actually. Best summarised by Nigel's statement : " I can come here everyday ". Played Who's The Boss or something along that line where we invested and deal with fellow players. Jasper and Guo joined us after a while and we had a damn nice time making deals and screwing up deals also.
At night was spent forming decks and I have this kind of like syndrome. When I focus super hard, I will be mentally exhausted after that matter. Evidence was the 2 decks formed and after that I was comepletely drained, oblivious to Guo's stupid taunting and nonsense.
A day down though. =D
Sunday's match of Arsenal VS Chelsea looms and for once in my life, GO GUNNERS!
Yes Keith, please beat Chelsea for us. Benefits you all also leh!
Carrying your name, close to me.
10:25 AM
10:25 AM
For the first time, I went to VivoCity. Replace the "Mountain Tortoise" tag with a big "Been there, Saw that" tag.
The trip was fun fun fun. Let the pictures say it. Oh, and Toys R Us was super fun to be in. Messing around with kid's toys brings back what Marcus called "Broken Childhood". AND OMG! CANDY EMPIRE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Pinky CKT! You know whos is the dumbo who spilled it. Cant be me, Aqilah or Marcus. So obviously, the DDGirl is XUEWEI!
This is why Toys R Us was humiliating for Marcus. Courtesy of me, who suggested going in. Christmas hats, testicle grabbing machines and more! YES YOU SAW RIGHT! TESTICLES! Xuewei was so tickled by it.
Taking a rest and I don't know why the 2 of them like to sit on the floor when got benches for them. Somemore this was when Marcus finally collapsed. Suspect was the emotional turmoil in him.
Coffee (and tea) at Coffee Bean where we talked about old days and spent many happy moments trading stories. $21.00 for all. Know how come I remember the price?
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Excluding the camera-shy Marcus, before we went up the 10 for a butt-numbing journey back home.
Through the fun and laughter, I had a heart stopping moment at Vivo, or rather outside Vivo. And I really felt scared and fearful about it. I just don't know how to put it but it was scary. I was really stunned in the middle of the road, although on the "Island" underneath the highway.
For the first time since last new year, I found myself praying to a God I am guilty of not being in touch with for the last months.
Carrying your name, close to me.
7:33 AM
7:33 AM
The shopping bug has bitten me real bad.
ANYONE WANT TO GO SHOPPING?!?!?! I AM ADDICTED ALREADY!
On the other hand, have you realised Singapore temperature just freaking dropped? I just woke up this morning with my hands feeling F***ing cold for unknown reasons. I switched off my fan at around 6 am cause I was shivering and yet I woke up at 9.30 with my palms just as cold.
My activities for this week :
1. OPEN SEASON!
2. Shopping.
3. Work, either by Calvin's reco or with Guo and Nigel.
4. Gym.
5. Minimise DotA time.
Carrying your name, close to me.
10:11 AM
10:11 AM
I fucking need to sleep but I cannot. Basket.
No exaggeration but everytime I try to, something pops up in my mental eye that makes me lie awake watching the night sky from my room window.
That's why I am here so late, watching the Opening Ceremony of Asian Games, chatting with the owls and trying to put off sleep As Long As Possible.
Its a bloody torture.
Carrying your name, close to me.
12:50 AM
12:50 AM
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Wo Yao Xiao Dao Wo Bian XIAO!
Carrying your name, close to me.
10:56 AM
10:56 AM
